Week 6: Second Pregnancy Syndrome

There’s a term called Second Pregnancy Syndrome and it covers all the shit that happens to a woman the second time she gets pregnant. As I’m learning, it’s harder the second time around. For one thing, you’re more attuned to all the changes and you’re probably fatter, your posture sucks and well, you’re older.

But the thing is, women don’t talk about this stuff. We never discuss the things that happen to us. Did you know your vagina turns a blue-ish purple in the final stages? No one mentioned this during my first run and then one day, my hubby was helping me put on my underwear when all of a sudden, he got a nervous look on his face and I knew something was wrong.  Purple va va syndrome.

Why don’t women talk about these things? I know I always did. Not in the hallways at work but at book club, or the back booth at Brixx or even in the Apartment 9 section at Kohl’s.

The term “Second Pregnancy Syndrome” was introduced this week at my first doctor’s appointment. And it was here that two things became official: I was pregnant and I was pissed at every woman that came before me who had a second baby.

Here’s the thing: Us women need to stick together. Sure, we don’t have to do that in the work place. In fact, I’m really cool with my gender throwing me under the bus at the office. I would never do it to you. But I expect it in return. But when we don’t give each other the appropriate facts and information, we screw each other in ways that are far more detrimental than a bus. We make decisions based on tales of ponies and soft blankets and not accuracies. So let me just make this clear: I am officially pissed at all the women I know that had a second pregnancy and didn’t tell me how much it sucked.

Did you hear that Zoe? Chloe? Lowie? Joey?

Yo: Clara, Sara, Sarah and Tara. Yeah, I’m pissed at you biatches, too.

This includes Annie and Frannie, as well.

And don’t think because you’re pretty that you, Stacy, Tracy and Kasey are excused.

I’m pissed at you biatches. So watch your back.

<p><a href=”http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=989″>Image: healingdream / FreeDigitalPhotos.net</a></p>


 Mommyality combines Mommy and Reality. You never know what's going to happen, nor do you want to know. Read more from this author


Comments

  1. I can SO relate! I’m currently 28-ish weeks into my second pregnancy, at 36 years old. Most of the time, I feel like I’m in my 60’s. I’ve had a really rough go with this pregnancy — as you said, you’re more attuned to what goes on with your body, and I think some things happen earlier… I didn’t really have hip pain until nearly the last month, the first time. Second pregnancy = pain the entire time! The weight doesn’t bother me that much, but I DID reach the same size I was at my first delivery, in the 4th month of this pregnancy.

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